Speed Dating: What Is It? Does It Work? Online Dating vs. Speed Dating & More
How Does Speed Dating Work? Zoom Speed Dating, Virtual Speed Dating, Singles Events, Speed Dating vs Online Dating, Singles Events vs Dating Apps, Dating Apps vs Speed Dating, What Is Speed Dating?
Modern Dating by Eddie is written by Eddie Hernandez, dating coach based in San Francisco. He works with men & women seeking long-term relationships.
Unlike other dating coaches, he doesn’t deliver hot takes on Instagram or Tik-Tok, doesn’t go into red-pill theories nor does he overlook personal experiences when working with clients one-on-one.
He focuses on the building blocks of successful dating attributes like:
first impressions, social skills, hygiene, body language
photos, bios, prompts, messages, strategy, timing
filtering profiles, understanding preferences and deal-breakers
ID’ing red flags, cutting off time-wasters & reading people
Read more about him here: https://moderndatingbyeddie.substack.com/about
What Is Speed Dating? How Does Speed Dating Work?
Speed dating has been around for some time and every February, internet searches peak for such activities as Valentine’s Day approaches. The movie Hitch with Will Smith popularized such an event in one scene here.
Speed dating is a structured event where people interact with each other for a set period of time (almost like musical chairs). It can be seated or standing or some other format but the idea is that you chat with people for 3-5 minutes or whatever limit is established.
At the end of the evening, the host relays contact info if both parties mutually like each other and wish to keep in touch. There are many variations but the Hitch clip should give you an idea.
Speed dating has been getting even more traction as distaste for dating apps has reached all-time highs.
Thanks to Covid, people were largely left to their own devices (phones & dating apps) to meet people due to safety concerns and shutdowns. People are looking to meet others in person and get offline and speed dating offers one possible outlet for such interactions.
Before you sign up blindly for those speed dating events, it’s important to understand how we got here, what to look out for, who speed dating is for and why you should avoid it.
Conventional Speed Dating Events
Speed dating events largely were advertised on sites like Craigslist, Meetup, ads on Facebook/Instagram as well as event directories like Eventbrite and more.
At the core, someone would organize an event at a venue and invite people to attend. Assumedly these people woudl be single and they would have a chance to interact with each other at the event. If interested, they would exchange contact info directly or through the organizer.
The idea behind speed dating was to go on many small or mini-dates of about 2-5 minutes to see if there is some kind of mutual interest.
Who Uses Speed Dating? What To Expect From Speed Dating Events?
Some events are very generic and take place during the week or weekends (6-10pm) during off-peak hours. They don’t have a target audience and usually sell tickets to whoever was willing to buy them.
Over time, better organizers surfaced that curated attendees, usually by age groups i.e. 20-30s’ over 50 and the like. These in theory are better but often times pretty lame as there was no itinerary/structure to the events.
The best events monitored signups to balance gender ratios, add activities to the evening rather than have people stand around and talk to each other randomly but event then, these events can leave something to be desired by the turnout.
Typically people who attended events were divorced, single, lacked friends, shy about approaching people offline, new in town or brand new to dating. Often times, speed dating events can feel like an awkward middle school or high school dance.
Virtual Speed Dating
With the increased adoption of dating apps, people proved they were willing to meet strangers on the internet without the need to talk with them in person first. Virtual speed dating was born. Similar, to dating apps, people would create simple profiles, login to apps/sites at specific days and times and talk to people who were registered for the event.
Virtual speed dating never really took off as much as other channels i.e. matchmaking, speed dating events in person, dating apps until Covid hit. All bets were off as people wanted to optimize all channels for meeting others while in isolation and when many bars, cafes, clubs, shut down.
Speed Dating Apps: Bumble Speed Dating
Speed dating had gotten so popular and people have become so frustrated with online dating that dating apps entered the space. They already had the existing technology and user bases to help people connect similar to virtual speed dating platforms but now with greater traction.
Bumble launched Speed Dating not to long ago to force people to connect on video instantly rather than deal with endless texts and ghosting. The first iteration was called Bantr (partnership with the hit show Ted Lasso) but since has ditched the tagline and reverted back to the generic Speed Dating name.
You can read more about Bumble speed dating here.