Modern Dating Advice: Practical Dating Guide For Men & Women
Modern Dating Advice for Women; Dating tips for apps, offline efforts, social skills, first impressions, confidence, mindsets, attracting more of what you want. Modern Dating Advice For Men
Practical Dating Advice For Women & Men
Modern Dating by Eddie is written by Eddie Hernandez, dating coach based in San Francisco. He works with men & women seeking long-term relationships.
Unlike other dating coaches, he doesn’t deliver hot takes on Instagram or Tik-Tok, doesn’t go into red-pill theories nor does he overlook personal experiences when working with clients one-on-one.
He focuses on the building blocks of successful dating attributes like:
first impressions, social skills, hygiene, body language
photos, bios, prompts, messages, strategy, timing
filtering profiles, understanding preferences and deal-breakers
ID’ing red flags, cutting off time-wasters & reading people
Read more about him here: https://moderndatingbyeddie.substack.com/about
The last thing you need in life is more dating advice. Chances are you will brush this off or skip it because there are not enough bullet points, photos, charts or definitive advice on what to do.
Dating Is A Crap Shoot But Luck Is Not Everything
Dating is not meant to be easy or straight-forward. Unlike studying for an exam, saving for a house, working hard for a promotion or working out at the gym, dating doesn’t guarantee results if you do ‘X’. This drives lots of people nuts.
Yes, luck, timing, being in the right place counts for a lot but these are things that can be worked on. Luck is when preparation meets opportunity.
You can do everything right and fail miserably.
You can do everything wrong and stumble on success.
You can approach someone in 10 different ways and get 10 different outcomes.
This may seem crazy but I have seen it all over the last 10+ years. Dating is illogical but that doesn’t mean you can ignore all etiquette, strategy, best practices and data. The people who tend to struggle most are those who fall into one or more of these categories:
are too logical/analytical, treat people like a commodity
tend to over-correct based on past experience(s),
have yet to receive good unbiased advice (not talking about your friends who never struggled or have attributes that you don’t)
have not put in the work
not ready to date (dealing with some trauma, past relationship issues or similar)
treat dating like a numbers game
blame others, apps, culture etc. for their failures rather than look at themselves
do the same thing expecting different results
have unrealistic expectation (looks, checklists, timing, etc.)
oversimplify attributes (I am rich, I am a pretty woman, I am a nice guy etc. )
don’t possess a growth mindset (think they are a finished product)
have jaded outlooks on life
fail to understand that the people they are targeting may not want to date people like them
are unwilling to make drastic changes in their lives for love
lack the ability to decipher mixed signals, different studies/advice, conflicting facts and focus on a strategy that is customized for themselves
Modern Dating Advice For Men, Women
Look, I am not a motivational speaker. I am not a therapist. I am not some dating coach who blows sunshine up your ass. I am a terrible salesperson which is why I don’t give advice on YouTube, Instagram or Tik-Tok.
My ideal clients and audience are not people who seek out such advice from such influencers. My ideal clients are those that take the time to read, reflect, put in the work and work on themselves rather than share posts on social media.
I don’t believe in mathematical formulas to determine the best partner for you i.e. benchmarks. I don’t believe in gimmicks; nothing can replace hard work, focus, self-improvement, better decision making and learning from mistakes.
I don’t believe you shouldn’t give an F*** (you should, dating is high stakes endeavor but you shouldn’t overly invest yourself too quickly/often in strangers).
If you follow my advice, chances are you will still make mistakes, nothing is guaranteed. However, ideally, you will make fewer of them, cut time wasters off sooner, make smaller mistakes and be in a better position to attract better quality people in your life.
Dating Advice For Men, Women
Dating is not easy. In fact, I will agree it’s harder now more than every but that doesn’t mean people don’t find love on apps. It doesn’t mean that people don’t mean in person anymore. It doesn’t mean people don’t want relationships, marriage and kids anymore.
Dating takes a lot of effort, planning, timing and luck (as it should). If you are asking someone to give you their time (time away from work, health, friends and family), you better come ready and provide a compelling reason to do so.
People invest their time, money and focus on education, career, finances and health but for some reason, they often tend to just wing dating, relationships and love. I would argue that finding a partner/spouse is the most important decision one can make in their lives.
Below are some basic tips to do better while dating but like all dating advice, nuance is needed (and we will dig into those details in the coming weeks and months ahead).
Related Reads On Modern Dating:
Is Dating Harder For Women Or Men?
For those seeking help, check out my dating coaching services here.