Dating In San Francisco vs New York
Dating in SF vs NYC As A Woman, Man; Is Dating in New York Easier For Men? Is Dating In SF Hard For women? Dating in SF vs NYC statistics, Should I Move To NYC? SF Dating Scene, NYC Dating Culture
Reader question: Dating is miserable in San Francisco, I don’t meet women in person, apps are terrible and I have given up. I am considering moving to New York as I hear it’s much easier for men there - should I make the move?
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As a dating coach, I get a ton of questions regarding dating, but the one question I get asked repeatedly and more often than ever is about moving from SF to NYC for dating purposes. I grew up in the Bay Area, live in SF but also lived in NYC. I still love to visit and miss it dearly; many of my clients come from there.
There are pros and cons for each city and different things to consider for men and women alike. It’s not as straightforward as you might think.
Many people are frustrated with dating (both men and women) but it seems like more men are taking more drastic steps to change their environment and situation, or at least seriously considering it by hiring me to figure things out.
Related reads:
Dating In San Francisco Statistics, Gender Ratios
While this data set was from 2018 and was for Match.com, the data is representative for other dating apps.
What happens often is that guys gravitate toward dating apps earlier in life while women start to use them more often later in life. More on this down below.
Dating in SF and the greater Bay Area can be brutal for young men, especially those who:
rely on dating apps for all or even most of their dating efforts
live further away from San Francisco
Given things like lack of friends, lack of dating experience and social awkwardness, dating in SF can send many guys into a whirlwind of frustration and desperation.
Dating In New York City Statistics, Gender Ratios
The above chart features the same data but across other Northeastern US cities (also taken in 2018). The gender ratios are no so imbalanced as they are in the Bay Area but it’s important to know these are dating app gender ratios, not actual gender ratios.
As a dating coach, I have never advocated for men (or women) to rely on dating apps for all or even most of their dating efforts.
Dating has gotten so bad that people have gone as far as to create dating apps to fly women to SF and men to NYC to date given the gender ratios illustrated above.
A lot of people look at data sets like this above and make life decisions based on easy-to-digest information, but the truth is, dating in SF or NYC, or in general for that matter, is a lot more nuanced than gender ratios.
Every city has its challenges, every city has it’s vibe and more so, every city can inject a new perspective based on new environments, surroundings, social circles and more.